The Joe and Smith Podcast: Read the Book of Mormon with us

We are ex-Mormons and we’re re-reading the Book of Mormon together, but this time we know that it’s a work of fiction. We think we’re funny. In each episode we read a new chapter from the BOM and uncover how the church’s teachings affected us in our conservative, faithful days. We believe in love and acceptance, but we process some anger along the way. Expect lightmindedness, loud laughter, evil speaking of the Lord’s anointed, and taking the name of the Lord in vain.

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Episodes

Mosiah 13 (Solo Joe-lo!)

Monday Sep 25, 2023

Monday Sep 25, 2023

This ep would be all-the-way skipable if it weren’t for the action we get from King Noah and the crew. Smith wasn’t feeling well, and it had been too long since an episode was released, so Joe broke protocol and recorded a solo episode. It serves the dual purposes of moving along in the reading, as well as demonstrating the necessity of our dear Smith. 
Joe questions his own sanity in talking to himself. Abinadi flexes on King Noah’s priests, and then he provides some bible fan fiction of the 10 Commandments. Joe thinks about making an idol of his axolotls. Joe goes on for too long about the idea of a Shabbat goy. The bible reminds us that a wife (and a servant) is a possession. Joe noticed that everyone who is made angry by the statement “Mormons are Christians” are people he doesn’t want to hang out with. He quotes Air Supply.  
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for

Mosiah 12

Monday Sep 11, 2023

Monday Sep 11, 2023

Joe bears testimony of necessary divorce, and the guys realize that they wouldn’t be good marital partners to each other. Smith gets emotional over Joe’s fast food. Smith changes his opinion from last week about OK Go videos and admits to having watched videos for: This Too Shall Pass, Needing/Getting, White Knuckles, but not The One Moment. The corrections department lets us know about Charlotte Gainsbourg whose name was missed last week. Smith reminds the listener of some recent controversy regarding a temple in Cody, WY. Smith comes up with a great safe word for BOM bondage. They guys reflect on which HP characters received howlers. The guys take a couple of detours getting distracted by Smith’s wienerdog and Joe’s axolotls. Smith reminds Joe and the listener about Rusty’s 2003 Ensign article about how god’s love is not unconditional. Joe talks about the good influences of the church over the years and expresses frustration. 
Joe gets annoyed that he still gets defensive when people tell him that Mormons are not Christians. Smith reminds Joe about a picture of a religious billboard that Joe sent to him this week. The guys talk about the fanfiction from the 10 commandments that finish off this chapter. Joe talks about a convo he had with someone who lived in ID who had a positive experience living among the mormons. Joe talks about watching Gentlemen Broncos (2009) with their #1 Patreon subscriber and remembers that toward the end, the film includes an antiquated anti-trans term. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for

Mosiah 11

Monday Sep 04, 2023

Monday Sep 04, 2023

For a minute Smith convinces Joe that a church-produced JS video was directed by Lars von Trier. Joe gets excited about this OK Go video. Joe refers back to one of Brucer’s theories about rainbows. The guys touch on the phenomenon of white mormon boyz wearing lavalavas to church. Smith tells us about that shithead King Noah, and his unnamed father. Joe makes an irreverent reference to Astronaut Jones from SNL in the 90’s. Smith describes an early cryptocurrency ZiffCoin. Smith provides an anecdote from the other side of Brother Brigham’s conference center prophecy. Joe’s Hightower joke does not land. Smith tries to tell Joe and the listener about some recent controversy regarding a temple in Cody, WY.
Joe comes back with another google translation hymns game. Smith is vague about his definition of cockubine. The guys can’t help themselves re all the bondage talk in this chapter. This chapter overtly teaches that god is “slow” to answer prayers of people he doesn’t like as much, not a great example of unconditional love. For some reason, Smith can’t stop envisioning King Noah and Abinadi in a way that can only be described as Fribergian. Joe pitches the next Indiana Jones movie- the golden plates. Joe thinks that the church is too big to fail. The guys pontificate about what kind of social problems could be solved with $150B. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for

Mosiah 10

Sunday Aug 27, 2023

Sunday Aug 27, 2023

Joe got excited to show Smith clips from the Richard Dawson-era Family Feud. Check this post on our patreon site for a taste. Joe plays a family feud-style game from some of his screenshots. Smith is curious about the name of King Laman and whether it’s a name that shall not be named. Joe revisits the idea of trying to keep a sportsmanlike attitude when it comes to the idea of whether or not JS wrote or translated the BOM. Smith recalls hearing this episode of the oooold Mormon Matters podcast. Here is a link to a follow-up Jahndallyn episode where Natasha discusses her excommunication. Look at him. Smith gets excited about the prospect of a high budget, church-funded, Hollywood, BOM movie. 
The lord is not pleased with Laman’s m-bation. Smith provides an inspiring reenactment of Zeniff/President Whitmore from Independence Day’s inspiring speech. Smith referred to this exmo read it post where heroes have taken a D Ass Bednar post and made their own narration. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for

Mosiah 09

Sunday Aug 20, 2023

Sunday Aug 20, 2023

Welcome to chapter 9, chapter 9, chapter 9. The guys briefly talk about body counts in works of fiction. Smith refers to this reggae song. Joe tries to list the hosts of Family Feud over the years. This episode was released during the wildfires on the island of Maui in August of 2023. Several responsible nonprofits have launched fire relief efforts, including:
The Hawai‘i Community Foundation “Maui Strong Fund.” Make donations at https://www.hawaiicommunityfoundation.org/maui-strong.
The Hawai‘i Red Cross, is assisting with shelters for those displaced by the fires. Make donations at https://www.redcross.org/local/hawaii.html.
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for
 

Mosiah 08

Monday Aug 14, 2023

Monday Aug 14, 2023

Smith delights us with a dollop-esque intro, and then discusses this post from ex-mo read it about someone playing b-ball with the Sandman. Joe got some advice from his kids about a possible BB spinoff. Ammon likes to rehearse in this chapter. Joe comes up with his idea of King B’s last words. Smith refers to this terrifying/telling photo of Jeff Warrens and his wives. Smith uses this chapter to piece together the equation rehearsal > evidence. 
This chapter tends to focus on someone trying to get someone else to translate ancient golden plates. Weird. Joe tells another kid story about a Jason Bourne corn p-cast. The guys discuss starting a colt cult. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for

Mosiah 07

Thursday Aug 10, 2023

Thursday Aug 10, 2023

The guys are back after a break! Joe learns of Smith’s fandom of The Doors and his trumpetsmanship. Smith had a great idea involving a film where Tom Cruise is a stuntman for a Tom Cruise lookalike who portrays the lead in said film. The guys discuss some Wes Anderson movies and actors. King Mosiah gets teased. Ammon shows up and spoils the L-word regarding the baller director, but he’s so dreamy and strong. Joe gets excited by a character named Hem. 
The guys take a moment to thank their actual #1 Patreon subscriber! Smith goes over some instances in which missionaries will ghost investigators. The guys get sarcastic about the murkiness of the LDS godhead in the BOM. Joe can’t help but refer to All the Food is Poison. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for
 

Mosiah 05 and 06

Monday Jul 24, 2023

Monday Jul 24, 2023

The guys start with a little bit of companionship inventory that they learned on their missions. Smith confesses to a secret goal he used to have about his beard length. Joe refers to this part of an old Tom Goes to the Mayor episode. Smith bares his testimony of who he thinks is the best Big Brother contestant. Smith gives another super long quote from KB’s people that was amazingly in unison. Joe comes to the rescue for listening to this episode of the Pete Holmes’ pcast with our beloved prophet Brian Regan. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for
 

Mosiah 04

Tuesday Jul 18, 2023

Tuesday Jul 18, 2023

The guys try to contextualize some of the dom/sub talk from last week. Joe asks about old missionary tales of baseball/pool baptisms. Smith confesses some sins from his mission including watching Super Troopers (2001) on a TV/VCR from the church library. Again, Joe talks about Crispin Glover and tells anecdotes which can be mostly backed-up in this AV Club interview with him. Joe makes a correction from last week about his notion of Protestant Jesus. Smith reminds the listener about D’Oakes’ Hosanna shout mishap. Joe compares the King Ben’s conditions on God’s love to something Brené Brown says about scarcity culture. 
Joe remembers a seminary lesson for this chapter where they watched this Phil Collins video. Joe refers back to this episode of Mormonism Live where they talk about devaluing the JST and the KJV. Smith proposes and Elvis brother over an eldest brother. 
 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for
 

Mosiah 03

Sunday Jul 09, 2023

Sunday Jul 09, 2023

Smith keeps trying to get Jeezy Chreesties [sic] to stick. Smith tries to convince Joe that an angel gave Smith a urim and thummim. This chapter of the BOM includes a quick, Bible fan fic, summary of the life and times of JC. Joe forgets the title of the Crispin Glover movie, Willard from 2003. Bane returns to give us a long wind-up and prediction of JC from the BOM. Joe expresses his disappointment for the lack of bear intercourse in The Revenant (2015). Smith calls Joe out for trying to move things along by giving Smith agreeable answers. Joe celebrates that he can get answers to simple questions without ads from ChatGPT by Open AI, Smith predicts what the future will be like with ads. 
Smith has more promises from his urim and thummim. Joe refers back to several dirty raps from the old Harmontown podcast. The guys piece together how this chapter of the BOM brings non-consensual dom/sub dynamics into LDS scripture. Smith refers back to this episode of The Dollop podcast. The guys refer back to the NF doc, Murder Among the Mormons as well as the co-directors’ episode of the Jahnadlyn fun hour. 
Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal
The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org 
Become a Celestial Subscriber on our patreon at- https://patreon.com/joeandsmith 
Remember who you are and what you stand for

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Remember Who You Are and What You Stand For

 

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