1 Nephi 13

Smith once again starts again with a prayer and Joe respectfully closes his eyes. The guys talk timelines in the Breaking Call Saul-iverse. Ask and ye shall receive: Joe would like an award for being an adult. The guys talk about the “never enough” attitude both in and outside the church. Smith tells us about giving himself an out while giving Priesthood blessings. Guessing game: how many UT municipalities are named after LDS apostles? The guys talk about worshiping BY and JS. There is an LDS scripture that puts JS as the 2nd most important person to have ever lived on earth. Nice. The guys remember watching the Netflix documentary Abducted in Plain Sight (2017) which kind of serves as an example of how church members can be a little extra susceptible to sociopaths since a guy that they definitely don’t worship may have been one. The guys sound old while expressing their disapproval of youtubers who do a lot of screaming. Smith mentions Andy Daily (good) and Rush Limbaugh (bad) in the same sentence. Joe is not ready to admit that he used to listen although he readily admits to all sorts of shameful Mormonocities. The guys go down a Crispin Glover rabbit hole and Smith reads a plot summary of the Werner Herzog film Even Dwarfs Started Small (1970). 

Smith starts off chapter 13 reminding us that there is an angel who loves to show stuff to Nephi. Like, all sorts of stuff. The guys are reminded about how the BOM goes all-in on Christopher Columbus, and not the good one. The same chapter gives us some foreshadowing about how the BOM gets into some pretty uncomfortable territory regarding, you know, people with white skin being more blessed. Ideas for blowing through Jacob chapter 5? We still have time to figure it out. Joe has some pretty well-timed exasperated sighs in this ep. Joe isn’t proud of his young jingoistic missionary self. Q- How likely is it that this abominable church was founded by a mythical creature? A- about as likely as a different church was founded by a guy who said he was visited by other mythical creatures. Fucking plain, and godamn precious, things. Yes Joe, the Pixies have a song that mentions 7 is God’s number. Smith (rightfully) loses his mind over the repetition and cadence that is happening at the end of this chapter. Listeners, adieu. 

Peaches - The Presidents of the United States of America https://youtu.be/wvAnQqVJ3XQ

Pixies - Monkey Gone To Heaven (Official Video) https://youtu.be/EHC9HE7vazI?t=109 

 

Music Provided by Eric VanAusdal with permission from the artist.

The Book of Mormon is publicly available at churchofjesuschrist.org

 

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